This month, I have been trying to focus intentionally on thankfulness. Over and over again in Scripture, God commands us to rejoice and give thanks. I have been woefully deficient in this for many years.
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 - Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.
Philippians 4:6 - Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving present your requests to God.
Colossians 4:2 - Continue earnestly in prayer, being vigilant in it with thanksgiving.
Ephesians 5:18-20 - And do not be drunk with wine, for that is dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit, speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord; always giving thanks for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God, even the Father; and be subject to one another in the fear of Christ.
I've heard many pastors talk about giving thanks in all things. No matter what our circumstances, we can always be thankful to God - for His love, our salvation, justification, His presence, His provision, and so many other things. And while it is hard to give thanks to God when life is hard and painful, I have tended to think of thanking and praising God through pain as "a sacrifice of praise."
But this morning, I woke up with a bad migraine. Bad enough that I was crying while driving to get my groceries. I admitted to God that I am having a hard time being thankful, because I really miss my husband and was in such excruciating pain. As I was talking, I admitted that I really don't know how to be obedient to Ephesians 5 - how to give thanks for all things.
How do I give thanks for a disease that leaves me in terrible pain, plays with my emotions and contributes to depression, and causes me to miss out on social events and has caused me to lose countless friends? How do I give thanks for something that negatively impacts every aspect of my life?
Oh, I can be immensely grateful that I just went 17 days between migraines - possibly the longest I've ever gone between attacks since my diagnosis in 2005. I can be grateful for my medicine and for ice packs and for a loving husband who takes care of me even though care-taking during illness doesn't come very naturally to him.
But how can God expect me to be thankful for the migraine disease itself?
Well, God gave me an answer today at church. I wasn't sure how I was going to make it, but Grandma really wanted to go to church, so I took meds and prayed for strength. Boy, am I glad I did.
Our pastor was preaching from Mark 2, and near the end of the sermon he started talking about how two of the hardest things for us are submission to the Word and suffering. But it was what he said next that struck me right in the heart:
"We can thank God for our suffering, because anything that brings us to the throne of God, to get us to admit that we can do nothing on our own, to get us to rely on the strength of Christ, is worth rejoicing over."
There it is.
My answer.
Straight from God, to my heart.
I can be thankful for my migraines, because they cause me to admit my own weakness. They cause me to rely on God. I can only rely on His strength when I admit my own weaknesses.
So thank you, Jesus, for giving me migraines. Thank you for giving me something that leads me to your throne. Something that leads me to sit in your lap and hold on while you carry me.
2 Corinthians 12:9 - And He has said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness." Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me.
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